Being a dad is a wholly unique and incredible experience, if we let it be. If we’re present, if we’re intentional, and if we stay open to limited moments we get to share with your kids.
This is a weekly dispatch of just how amazing being a father can be. I’ll share out stories, experiences, resources, and gear reviews every week.
I’m so stoked to be a dad (dada as Hannah calls me), and I want to share that excitement with others.
I remember when my wife was pregnant with our first; so many people gave us a crap sandwich of advice: “we love it, it’s the best, I mean the kids are the worst, you don’t sleep, and life is harder, but really love it”. “Just wait until they turn “x age” (it’s always different depending on how hard that particular age is for those parents). It was strangely deflating at times. I built up this story in my head about how brutal being a dad would be: exhausting, stressful, zero free time, etc. Those people and that story I built were wrong. It’s true that there are some challenging moments, periods, and events. It’s true that each kid is different and maybe we just got cosmically lucky with Hannah. It’s true that there is far less of whatever “free time” means. But all of that is…temporary.
Every phase, season, development stage; all temporary. Those beautiful moments with your kid; temporary, like sand through a sieve. Those stressful moments of crying, sleepless nights, and endless bottle parts to clean; they won’t last forever.
This is why one of the core virtues of a stoked dad is to be present. To breathe in each moment, deeply, so that we don’t miss how quickly this experience passes us by.
How often do we hear, “they grow up so fast”, or “blink and you’ll miss it”? Before Hannah was born, I had a hard time connecting to that statement. Yet 3 years later, I’m scratching the surface of understanding that sentiment.
I want to be present, as much as humanly possible, to all of these moments. I want to feel and remember those little hands in mine, the way Hannah says certain words and phrases, and how excited she is to see me. I want to soak all of it up, because I know just how quickly it’s moving.
Being present isn’t easy, it’s even harder when our kids are struggling. It means I put down my phone, ground myself to where I’m currently located, and focus intently on the amazing little human in front of me.
We have these lists, the logistics of life constantly pulling at us. We have to tune those out in order to tune into the beautiful moments right in front of us.
To me, a stoked dad is a present dad. Fully immersed with their kids. I’m not going to be perfect at it, but I can learn to be good at it.
Be present, my friends.
Stokefully,
Kris